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2011-11-19

Jehova! Jehova! Jehova!


Until this morning, I did not know how to best handle that awkward situation you get into after hearing your doorbell and facing a Jehova's Witness once you open the door. Trying to be friendly, I usually end up with a copy of their incoherent, mind-numbing and logic-defying pamphlet The Watch Tower. I could just throw it away, but I usually browse through it, which in turn usually ruins my mood for the rest of the day. Even worse, accepting a copy leaves them with the hope that my soul can still be saved, which only makes them come back the next Saturday. Being unfriendly usually helps to drive them away, but that ruins my mood for the rest of the day just the same.


Being friendly and setting things straight right away, before they get a chance to talk too much, seems to be the trick.

        Jehova's witness lady: "We would like to talk to you about happiness."
        Me: "Oh, I am sorry, I was expecting someone else. We are selling stuff on craigslist and...."
        Lady: "Let me give you this..." tries to hand me the Watch Tower
        Me (friendly): "Please don't even try, I am an atheist."
        <brief moment of silence>
        Lady (friendly): "Well tell you what: have a good day!"

Okay, I probably just got lucky with that particular person (I guess she has some experience with atheists). But I suspect I will get a chance to try this again some day.

The irony of the story is: She wanted to talk to me about happiness, but the fact that I managed to cut that conversation short actually made me quite happy.